The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
someone owes me an orgasm
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
