god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Randomize
