She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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