He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
