I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
50% drunk capacity currently
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
