You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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