just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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