i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Farmville is her only friend.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
