I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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