when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
