So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize