Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Randomize
