Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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