This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
how does that bad decision feel?
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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