: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
