I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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