haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
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