My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
