if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I need to sanitize my soul.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Randomize