I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
