Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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