my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
You may now shotgun with the bride
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
