But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize
