Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
