I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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