I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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