put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
