wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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