the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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