I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Randomize