Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
