Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize