I've blown a few things in my day
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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