The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
