Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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