I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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