PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Randomize
