Small penises have feelings too.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
