There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize