stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
