He is such a slut. More and more my type.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize