Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
