I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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