Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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