so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
