i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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