All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
