you turned your livingroom into a bong?
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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