yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
