Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
