i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize